Holiday Burn Out
It’s only the beginning of December and I must admit, I am not enjoying the holidays this year like I have in the past. I am so behind on decorating and making things feel festive. I am usually loving the Christmas music on the radio, the lights on all the houses and all of the shopping craziness that goes along with this time of year.
Things seem hard this year. My vigor is gone. Am I just not be thankful or am depressed? Thanksgiving wasn’t normal. My Mother-In-Law wasn’t there. She passed away this year and she always made the stuffing and gravy. We had boxed stuffing, which I love and I helped my niece learn to make homemade gravy, but it wasn’t my Mother-In-Laws gravy. I knew Thanksgiving would stir my soul and my emotions. Now that Christmas is near and I am struggling with joy again, it is making me think about some things. Who do I want to be with on Christmas? Who needs somewhere to go on Christmas? Is there enough help at the local soup kitchen? Those are some of my deeper thoughts that go along with other thoughts of What gifts do I want to buy and for who? How much money is reasonable to spend? What am I going to cook this Christmas? These are the thoughts that fill my mind daily.
In reality, we create our own stress around the holidays, except for the pain and grief we bear from our family that has gone on to heaven before us. That is just there and hopefully we have support and skills to deal with those feelings. But let’s get honest. If you get anxiety from all the hustle and bustle of crowds in the stores and you get grumpy because the lady in the checkout line is just too happy and bubbly for your liking, then maybe you should shop online and save yourself the stress. I have had to do that this year. There are days that I am feeling just plain tired. I never thought I would struggle with this but here I am.
So what am I doing about my holiday burn out? I am keeping very detailed lists of what I need to do and when I want to do it. I ask myself if I need to ask for help with accomplishing my goal. Also, who should I ask to help? If I know that my best friend Suzy is all about coming over to help, but once she gets here and we start talking and low and behold 3 hours later we haven’t even started on what she came to help me with and she needs to leave in 20 minutes… that was not the person I should have asked for help. You always have that one person that is willing to help you but you know that you really just have too good of a time together and won’t get a darn thing accomplished. Save a girls night out for you and that person. Just because someone offers to help you doesn’t mean that they are the right person to actually get the job done. Put thought into your process and life can be a little less stressful. I am still trying to master this! I am also trying to be realistic. If I don’t have to do it this year, I am not. I don’t have to have every decoration put out. I don’t have to have a Christmas party or a even have to send cards to a hundred people. The struggle is real for everyone. I realize that sometimes I definitely get all in a tizzy about what I am not doing instead of slowing down and enjoying what I am doing. It’s ok not to be perfect and have everything looking like a Hallmark movie.
I am trying with each year, especially at Christmas to slow down, look at the big picture, not what is just in front of me but to relax and don’t sweat the small stuff. I have really realized that even when things are not perfect in our own mind and are not the way we would want them, it may be perfect for someone else. People don’t care if your house is decked out for Christmas or if your house is clean. They care about how they are treated at your house. They care about the memories that are being made with the people they love and care about. Take pictures every year. When you look at those pictures are you thinking about how clean someone’s house was or how many gifts were under the tree? No. Your remember what was being said at the time the picture was being taken, or how ugly your sweater was. LOL. Or how full your belly was because of the massive amounts of food you ate. Those are the important things.
Holidays are hard for some people. Trauma, death, sad memories, loneliness, illness and depression are real life things that effect how someone is feeling during the holidays. Be kind. Be courteous. Smile even when you don’t receive a smile back. You never know what it takes for some people to even get out of bed and face the day, especially when the holidays are associated with heartache.
I personally believe that Jesus is the reason for the season and that nobody should be alone during the holidays unless that is truly what they wish for. Open your hearts to make a difference for that someone you know that is struggling. It may be a hug that you can give, kind words, a hot meal, a shower, a warm bed, a plate of leftovers for the elderly neighbor that can’t get out in the snow, a surprise shoveled driveway, a compliment and so much more. The list can go on and on and on. It’s a hard world and people are hurting. Be the bright spot in someone’s day.
Holiday burnout means many different things for different people. If you are burnt out because your excessively shopping and exhausted? Stop! Don’t kill yourself. Slow down. It is not worth it. If you are burnt out because life just keeps kicking you in the teeth, ask for help, insight and don’t seclude yourself. You will only struggle more if you feel totally alone. If anyone needs to talk or vent, I am here. I will listen and not judge in any way.
Please feel free to comment on holiday burnout. I would love to hear your stories and successes. Be blessed and Merry Christmas to you all.
